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The Night before Christmas:
A Diabetic Adventure
Written collaboratively by the Tudiabetes Community
T'was the night before Christmas
And all
through the house
Not a creature was stirring
Not even a mouse.
From the kitchen I heard tiptoes
And a creak
And
as I got closer
The refrigerator squeaked.
I turned on the light
And looked all around,
Then something approached
me
With a leap and a bound.
I was stifled with fear
But expecting shear glee
This thing stood before me
Oh,
what could he be???!!!
And as moved I closer,
With nearly a sound
I couldn't believe
You can’t guess
what I found!
His head in the fridge
Stealing my sweet
then he looked at me woozy
And started retreat.
I
stepped right before him
Expecting the worst,
The odd little bugger
Ate my aged liverwurst!
It wasn’t
enough
He wanted a high
And went for the sugar
With a battle scream cry!!
He reached for the cake
With
pudding and cream,
"Don't try to stop me",
He said with a scream!
I'm desperate for sugar
And carbs and for
fat
This is the place
Without doubt I know that.
"Hand me the bread, pasta,
And fries,
And while you're
at it,
Please supersize".
…and some cute sugar cookies,
With icing galore
(Don't pretend that you didn't
Go
buy out the store...)
Then out on the lawn
Arose such a clatter,
I sprang to the front
To see what was the
matter.
Bright lights and sirens
And noises galore,
Loud footsteps and pounding
Upon the front door.
"Up
with your hands,
All eating must cease,
Yes it's us, we are here
We’re the Food Police"
"Oh Officer
you have the wrong man,"
Said he, with no malice.
"In fact I'm the Brady Bunch maid
My name's Alice".
I care
for six kids
All day and all night
And here you go trying
To stir up some fright.
"I've heard that before,
You’re
not fooling me,
Tell me
How high was your last A1C?"
"Diabetes you think?
It won't happen to me.
I'll
just stop eating candy,"
Then he started to flee.
But grabbed one more
And on the way out
Turn and smiled
Trying
to get out.
But the food police grabbed him
And gave him a lump
Ripped off his shirt
Revealing his pump.
"Now
turn over those goodies,
You sly little elf
I've got a big craving
To eat them myself."
"Keep away from my
sweets.
Keep away from my pump.
Come any closer
You’ll get tossed in the dump!"
The officer readied
Himself
for a bite,
The fat man then kicked
Just out of spite.
He said, “Aren't donuts enough
With your coffee
my friend?
After all at the waist
You barely can bend.”
He wanted to leave
And looked to the right.
His
chance for escape
Was coming in sight!
A swift move to the left,
A few steps to the right.
He's coming real
close
To getting out of sight.
Then he tripped and he fell
With a bang and a bump.
Somewhere in the snow
Was
lying his pump!
He scrambled to his feet
As fast as his weight would allow.
Wishing that someone
Had used
a snowplow.
He searched and he found it,
Put it on with a click.
This sweet eating creature
Was slick on the
stick.
He walked along the sidewalk
Denying defeat.
Looking down and ignoring
The scuff marks on his feet.
As
he stood there silently
With glaze on his face
I couldn't help but wish
To help make his case.
To help this
poor man
Get some hope and control
So that he could be well
And not lose to the ‘D’ troll.
I took
him into my home
And checked his BG
I couldn't believe it!
Five hundred and three!
He looked back on his life
Now
nothing was the same
Then tried to get up
But needed a crane.
And as he got up
From only, who knows where
Said
he, “Be gentle, use care
You're messing up my hair” !
Said a man in a crane
"Don't be a jerk"
Get
to the doctor's
and make your pump work!"
“But I like my carbs,
My cookies and treats!
Whatever you
say
Won’t make me retreat!”
Without choice he gave in
and they took him away
He looked at the
sign
"This way to Bombay."
The endo walked in
With a scowl on his face,
“My dear boy you know
You
are taking up space.
This is the third time this week
You know that we meet.
Understand, my dear boy
LAY OFF
OF THOSE SWEETS!”
And he gave him his pump
With some hope and some glee
And that sweet eater lowered
His
bad A1C!
So happy was he
And extremely pleased
“I will follow this meal plan
You can count on me!”
And
he followed his plan
Was low on the sweet
He went to his Endo
He just couldn't be beat!
He kept to his plan
And
he did not stray
Today, indeed,
Is great a happy day.
The moral of this story
Is stay under control
Or
we all could turn into
A sweet eating troll.
MERRY CHRISTMAS!
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